Do you celebrate valentines day?
Seth and I really don’t. Once I made him a one time only sappy valentine’s love mix cd, back in the days when people still burned cds. (On this cd was: Luckiest by Ben Folds, Lucky Ones by Bif Naked and I’m Gonna Always Love You from Muppets Take Manhattan, among others.) But, since my birthday is exactly a month after valentine’s day we made the decision as a couple to skip it.
My most memorable valentine’s day was my Freshman year of high school I think. I had been “dating” a friend of mine and he broke up with me as a joke the day before, but I didn’t get that it was a joke. He would tell me that later as well as saying since I took it so seriously he just decided not to correct it. We were still friends, and are still acquaintances online. He is a writer and fairly popular in certain online channels and once he broke up with me by saying “You are on a one-way trip to dumpsville baby, population you.” You can imagine how I was feeling about romance that next day.
So…I put on a pair of black tights, black platform boots and my favorite Gap t-shirt dress that honestly barely covered my bits and I have no idea how I was allowed to leave the house in it. Oh, and a pair of creme colored lacy butt underwear things so if the skirt rode up all you saw was my ruffly butt. I added super dramatic makeup and dark lipstick. I had my mom take me to Meijer which at the time still had a bulk candy section and I bought 3 pounds of gummy worms. I then walked around on campus at high school all day a gloomy sight in all the valentine’s chaos and I gave out gummy worms. It went over well honestly and I got the attention of even some of the popular people at school with my antics.
Later in the day I ran into my HUGE high school crush, you know the type I am talking about. I spun for him and asked him how I looked and he said I, “Looked like sex.” Which I then and still take as a compliment.
There have been many, many valentines in between this one and that one, but that day in 1997 was the peak of valentines greatness for me. Seeing the smiles on peoples faces when I walked toward them with my giant bag of worms wishing them a tolerable day. My whole life may have just been trying to recreate that kind of magic. Thanks to bad break up jokes and my flair for the dramatic.