Author: Betsy White

  • October 6 – 10 years of White

    October 6 – 10 years of White

    Ten years ago today Seth and I got married in a ceremony that was so personal to us that we wrote the whole thing, lol.

    Our wedding was largely DIY for Seth, myself and many members of my friends and family. My mom made Seth’s vest and my jacket. Seth made chainmaille flowers, and our chainmaille handfasting cord. I made button flowers and assembled my bouquet, the bouquet for my sister and the boutonniere’s for the guys and lots of little things. My sister in law Niki made our cupcakes. Our friend Cliff made our “wedding topper” diorama and the steps that led to the stage. So many people helped us along the way.

    Our wedding was uniquely ours. There was a bit of us in every aspect of the wedding. Our wedding was even featured in offbeat bride which you can see here: https://offbeatwed.com/columbus-steampunk-wedding/.

    Here is to 10 years of marriage and 15 years as a couple.

    And…The Halloween Countdown drawer of the day:

  • October 4 – My October TBR

    October 4 – My October TBR

    I am trying to read more this month, because I love books and I am ready to get my reading habit back after years of school.

    Currently Reading:                                            

    The Last Graduate by Naomi Novik

            

    To Be Read:                                                       

    The Book Eaters by Sunyi Dean.                       

    The Kiss Curse by Erin Sterling.                      

    The Golden Enclaves by Naomi Novik.          

    Revenge Body by Rachel Wiley  

    The Night Library of Sternendach by Jessica Levai  

    When Life Gives You Vampires by Gloria Duke Narrated by Meg Sylvan     

    Bookish Bingo is looking like this now:

    And my Halloween Countdown item for today is…

  • October 3 – A Ghost Story

    This year for one of my classes I wrote a story that I would consider a ghost story. It was inspired by a quote from a high school friend, Jarod Anderson who writes as The Cryptonaturalist. It is not perfect but I liked it and thought you might enjoy.

    “The Mind is a Haunted House”

    Every memory is a ghost and the house they haunt is you. – The Cryptonaturalist (Jarod K. Anderson)

                Delilah screamed as she shot up like a bolt from a deep sleep. She hugged her arms against her chest to slow her heart and to warm herself up. Her breath came out in gasps, visible mist in the cool air and dim light of her bedroom. Despite the chill, she was dripping sweat from the tip of her nose and small rivulets were making their way down her cheeks to puddle in the corners of her mouth leaving her tasting the salty brine of fear and, yes, tears that were steadily flowing from her eyes. She lifted her t-shirt to wipe ineffectually at her face, then swung her legs out from under the blankets. The shock of the cold hardwood under her feet forced a curse from her lips, “Fuck.” She glanced at the time on her phone which was charging silently on her bedside stand, 2:32 A.M. She ran a hand through her long dark hair and then hurriedly scurried into her ensuite bathroom.

                 She debated for a moment before deciding to turn on the lights in the bathroom. She shuffled to the vanity where she washed her hands and face mechanically, an automaton running the just woke up program. She met her own eyes in the mirror and gasped audibly as she took in the entirety of herself.

    On her neck, stark and purple against the paleness of her skin, were a series of bruises. They had not been there three hours ago when she had finally put the book down and gone to bed, so where had they come from. She gingerly touched her neck, examining the bruises closer and realizing that she could make out the outlines of fingers, as though someone or something had tried to strangle her. She tried to remember what had pulled her from her sleep mere moments ago, but she didn’t remember.  Her only lingering thought was that her father had been a part of her dreams. But was it a dream? Or a memory?

    She knew to her bones that she was not going back to sleep, so she turned out the bathroom lights and padded back into her bedroom this time making her way to the ancient comfy blue overstuffed chair in the corner. The room smelled of sweat, wine, sandalwood, and the ghost of the cigarettes her aunt had once smoked here. There was another scent here as well, was it Drakkar? Was she imagining that smell because her father had been on her mind this week? She curled herself up in the chair finding herself absently rubbing her throat and thinking about the past couple of days.

    Tuesday morning, she had woken to a text from Penny, her stepmother, that simply read – Your father went home to Jesus this morning at 5:00 a.m. Delilah had begun to shake so hard she let the phone fall to the floor before following it to sit cross legged rocking. For a few blissful hours she had felt freer than she had in her entire life, the nightmares began that night and then she woke this morning with the phantom bruises. There was no freedom, only this.

    That was three weeks ago, and Delilah hadn’t had a night’s peace since. Every morning she wakes with new and worse bruises and feeling ever surer that her father’s spirit is the impetus. The abuse she suffered at the hands of her father as a child was not unknown but was rather an unspoken fact to her family, friends, and community. Everyone agreed that it was awful, but no one would step in between the preacher and his only child.

    Having reached her fill of his abuse and fearing how it might escalate further on October 31st of her sixteenth year Delilah ran away taking her mother’s wedding ring, the money she had saved babysitting neighborhood children and very little else. She had found sanctuary with her maternal aunt, Juniper, a woman whom her father had forbidden her from ever contacting. Juniper promised her safety and sanctuary vowing to protect her until the day she died.

    When Juniper passed on 5 years ago Delilah inherited the house and enough money to go to school debt free and get her degree in Library Sciences. Now Delilah worked at the local university as a librarian full time, maintaining the stacks and assisting graduate students. She had felt safe and secure in her life until a single text message had led the ghost of her father to her. Now the reverend was once again wielding prayers as weapons against his daughter. Filling her nights with reminders of how she is a disgusting sinner, a whore. Damned before the eyes of God.

    Delilah had lost 10 pounds in the last three weeks and her already pale skin had grown wan; her eyes were surrounded by dark circles. She became herself a ghost haunting the library by day and her own home by night. Her anxiety mixed with lack of sleep had her seeing her father in the faces of everyone she saw. She needed help. Then she saw the flyer on the community bulletin board from a local paranormal group who held a ghost encounter meet up once a month at the library. Delilah remembered the kind eyes of the gentleman who ran the group and that he had left a card in the office. She located it easily within the drawer of the large, shared desk and before she could talk herself out of it dialed the number.

    The phone was answered on the third ring. After the usual pleasantries Delilah explained how she had gotten the phone number and the reason for her call. She explained that she thought she was being haunted. She told him that she was losing hope. She asked him if he thought he could help. He told her he though he could. Delilah began to cry. She asked him how soon he could come. He asked if tonight would be too soon. She cried harder. She told him tonight would be perfect.

    Delilah went home at the end of the day to wait for a stranger to come to her house. She felt like she had been running a marathon for weeks and maybe, just maybe, there was an end in sight. She sat waiting for the doorbell to ring, feeling hopeful but trying to be realistic. She wondered if he could help her. And, if he couldn’t how much longer she would be able to survive this. Could the ghost kill her? He was certainly able to hurt her. She didn’t know or understand the rules to all of this. It scared her. Almost as much as the doorbell when it rang startling her out of her thoughts.    

    Delilah answered the door and introduced herself once again to Matt who was the kind eyed man she had met previously at the library. She ushered him inside and led him to her couch. After her assured her multiple times that he did not need anything to drink and was quite comfortable she folded herself into a chair and the two looked at each other. Embarrassed by the silence she nervously tucked her hair behind her ear and began to speak.

    “Thank you so much for coming on such short notice. I feel like I owe you more of an explanation than what I gave on the phone. I told you I think I am being haunted. By my father. I told you I am waking up with bruises that seem to be handprints. The first night they were around my throat, but they have appeared all over my body since so I am not sure if his ghost is trying to kill me or just to hurt me. I hear his voice as it is happening, taunting me, calling me names, preaching at me. Honestly, he is much in death as he was in life: abusive, virulent, and judgmental. We had almost no relationship in life after I left at sixteen, and in death he seems to be punishing me to make up for the time he couldn’t. I am scared to sleep now. I am scared to be alone. I am scared that I might not wake up the next time.”

    Delilah delivered this speech looking at her hands and having finished her thought she finally looked back at Matt. His eyes still looked kind and showed none of the skepticism she expected to see there. Instead, he was nodding telling her he understood, telling her that there can be these kinds of hauntings, and telling her that they have been successfully banished from homes. He asked to see the bruises that had happened the most recently. She revealed a handprint around her right wrist that looked like someone had grabbed with their right hand and squeezed tightly. He told her that being able to harm her like that was unusual but not unheard of. He told her that he would like to see her bedroom to see if he could feel or communicate with the spirit.

    Delilah nodded and pulled herself to her feet gesturing to him to follow her. She led him up the stairs and into her bedroom, taking a moment to be glad she had picked up her dirty clothes and made her bed this morning after her father had woken her up again. She watched him as he walked into the room slowly and appeared to be listening closely to, or for, something she could not hear. He spoke under his breath to himself, or someone unseen, then turned to Delilah telling her that he didn’t feel any kind of presence but that doesn’t really mean anything in the long run. She nodded again, feeling her heart sink a little despite his reassurances.

    Matt told her that since the attacks and sightings happen late at night, it might be of importance to the ghost or is related to an important time for the two of them. She told him that might be, but not for any reason that she can think of. She asked him if that meant he needed to be there at night when the ghost was more likely to appear. He nodded in confirmation, and she nodded back slowly. Her heart sunk once again that the relief she was hoping would come was still delayed.

    They decided to come up with a plan. First, she would find a place to stay for the night and Matt would stay in the house with equipment to see if her father appeared when she wasn’t home. She stayed with a friend overnight as planned and while she still had scary dreams she did not wake up with new bruises. Matt told her it was a quiet night for him as well and they decided to move to phase two. Night two Matt would stay in the house with her and watch all night to try to engage with the ghost.

    Delilah found herself seated in the living room with Matt watching some random MCU film and realized that sleep would need to happen soon. She brought Matt upstairs and showed him the guest room and the bathroom. She went to change and told Matt that she would call him when she was ready for bed if he wanted to come in and keep watch. She changed into her sleep shirt and shorts, brushed her teeth and laid down on her queen-sized bed. She called out to Matt that she was going to turn off the light and go to sleep now. After that she remembered very little until she woke scared once again

    Delilah screamed as she shot up like a bolt from a deep sleep. She hugged her arms against her chest to slow her heart and to warm herself up. Her breath came out in gasps, visible mist in the cool air and dim light of her bedroom. Her eyes shot to the last place she had seen Matt and instead of finding him as expected her eyes found her father looming at the end of the bed. She wanted to scream again, she wanted to cry, to run. She did none of these. Instead, she stood up on her bed and made eye contact with her father. Looking straight into the face of her tormentor she began to speak.  

    “No more, Daddy,” She whispered to the man in front of her reaching forward. “No more cowering. No more hiding. No more running away. I have been the outlet of your rage my whole life and I am done. I was never any of those things you accused me of being. I was just a little girl who desperately wanted the love of her father, and no matter how hard I tried to be good I was just never enough for you. I will never be enough for you. But, that is a problem with you, Daddy, not with me. You are…you were a horrible father and therefore a horrible man and I refuse to let you rule me anymore.” As she spoke her voice got louder and clearer. “Goodbye, Daddy. Good night, Goodbye and Good riddance.” She reached toward her father as she said that and feeling his shoulders beneath her hands she pushed hard. She watched him fall and disappear then she was alone again, and she collapsed back into sleep once more.

    She awoke to a room full of light the next day and looked at her phone on her bed side table to see that it was almost nine in the morning which meant she had slept almost through the night. She threw on her robe and sought out Matt to find out what had happened the previous night. She found him in the kitchen drinking coffee he had brewed at some point and staring out the window into her backyard. He turned when he heard her come into the room and smiled at her over the coffee cup. He told her that he had dozed off but woke up to her speaking to the spirit. He told her he felt the spirit leave. He told her she was free. He told her that she may want to talk to someone about her past. She carefully avoided looking at the bruises on his shoulders which might have been handprints. She agreed that it might be nice to talk to someone. She felt free.

    What do you think? I forgot to mention that the story could have a max of 2500 words.

    Here is my Halloween Countdown video of the day.

  • October 2 – My October Bucket List

    October 2 – My October Bucket List

    • Witch Walk 2022
    • Dark Market 2022
    • Carve a Pumpkin
    • Go to a Halloween Party
    • Celebrate our 10th anniversary
    • Attend Ren Faire at least once a weekend
    • Tales from the Crypt at Green Lawn Abbey
    • Finish and upgrade Mothman Costume for Faire
    • Read 4 books
    • Create a great basket for my spooky basket buddy
    • Have a fire and make smores

    That is a pretty good list to start. We were at the Renaissance Festival today for Time Travelers weekend. There were time lords, mandalorians, multiple tardises, and I was a triceratops.

    Photo of wenches, I am center front holding my triceratops mask to the side.

    Here is my treasure from my Halloween Advent for today…

    And my October book bingo as I read through The Last Graduate by Naomi Novik. Got several off the board.

  • Happy October 1st

    Happy October 1st

    October is my favorite month! I love the fall feeling (in Ohio we get cooler weather, leaves changing, and the whole shebang), the hot drinks, sweater weather, spoooky/witchy season, and just all of it!!

    I have my Halloween Advent Calendar which I have asked my nibling, Asher, to fill the first eight days of my calendar for me and the last 13 of the month are filled with the holiday countdown from Sucreabeille. I also bought the Kawaii Sicker Countdown by Pipsticks.

    Halloween Advent Calendar

    I am also planning to read more this month so…

    Bookish Bingo Board

    Expect to hear more from me as the month goes on. And see if I get a bingo. And check out October with me. For more random you can find me on TikTok @betsysnowwhite.

  • The Weapon of Choice

    The Weapon of Choice

    Last Tuesday I woke up around 9 o’clock in the morning. I said good morning to my husband and then I went into the bathroom to take a shower with a special anti-bacterial soap. I dressed in a pair of leggings and a sweatshirt. Around 10:45am Seth and I headed out to meet my mom at Grant Medical Center downtown. I was checked in and brought to a room where I changed into a surgical gown and socks. I waited here with my mom and Seth keeping me company until my doctor was ready. I was wheeled to surgery around 3:45pm and was in recovery around 5pm. I was in a room around 6pm and I was released around midnight to go home with my husband. We stopped at Taco Bell on the way home because I hadn’t eaten anything but crackers since around 7:30 Monday night. We ate dinner and went to bed and I no longer had any fallopian tubes.

    The official name of the surgery is Laparoscopic Salpingectomy. They made three small incisions: one on each side of my lower belly and one in my belly button. Then they removed my tubes completely. It is more efficient and safer than having the tubes tied or cauterized and there is no chance of ectopic pregnancy or pregnancy at all.

    When Roe v. Wade was overthrown by the Supreme Court I was sent into a mild panic. As a woman who has never wanted to have children and who typically utilizes the kinds of long term birth control that is also being called into question I immediately felt like some kind of permanent solution had to be found for me. I had been trying to get my tubes tied since I was in my twenties and was consistently told no. But, last year my sister who was 29 got approved for her tube removal, so I called her gynecologists’ office to make an appointment there.

    Dr. Williford walked in and said, you want to get your tubes removed. I confirmed I did. She said okay, let’s get you scheduled for surgery. I literally almost cried. It was that simple. I went in with a list of reasons, my husbands permission, etc. And she tells me that their office “believes women should be able to do whatever they want with their tubes.”

    Now here I am, a week of healing behind me. I will have some tiny scar on my belly that will be barely noticeable amongst the stretch marks already marking that skin. I cannot get pregnant anymore. I am breathing easier than I have since the day of the Supreme Courts action. Now I need to work to help others who aren’t as lucky as me. I am looking at volunteering for Planned Parenthood. I am donating to the Ohio Abortion Fund. I am voting in my best interests. This is my weapon of choice, choosing what is best for me, my friends, my sisters, my niblings, and our world.

  • Thank you for making me a reader

    Dear Grandma Bailey,

    Thank you for encouraging me to read. Thank you for letting me read aloud to you. Thank you for reading aloud to me. Thank you for buying me books for almost every birthday and holiday. Thank you for all the bookmarks. Thank you for letting me tell you all the stories. Thank you for staying up late with me to read in the summer. Thank you for your part in making me a reader.

    Dear Mom,

    Thank you for encouraging me to read. Thank you for never telling me a book was off limits. Thank you for always having money for me for the scholastic book fair. Thank you for taking me on book buying trips to various places in Columbus. Thank you for putting up with all my massive stacks of books in my room. Thank you for encouraging me to write. Thank you for all your support. Thank you for being proud of me. Thank you for your part in making me a reader.

    Dear Krystie,

    Thank you for encouraging me to read. Thank you for telling me that I was much too young to understand Shakespeare. Thank you for leaving your school texts around so that I could read Grendl, Macbeth and Hamlet when you weren’t paying attention. Thank you for inadvertently challenging me to read more and more difficult texts. Thank you for your part in making me a reader.

    Dear Mrs. Colvin,

    Thank you for encouraging me to read. Thank you for never saying a word when I checked out the same giant book of mythology again and again. Thank you for helping find all the books we had in our tiny Elementary School library about cryptids and hauntings. Thank you for laughing at my antics and appreciating my already strange sense of humor. Thank you for your part in making me a reader.

    Dear Mrs. Atchison,

    Thank you for encouraging me to read. Thank you for introducing me to The Phantom of the Opera by Gaston LeRoux. Thank you for not blinking an eye when I came dressed as Scarlet O’Hara because I was reading Gone with the Wind in fifth grade. Thank you for getting my first poem published. Thank you for your part in making me a reader and a writer.

    Dear Mrs. Kupper,

    Thank you for encouraging me to read. Thank you for teaching me how to properly read Dickens. Thank you for failing me because I undoubtedly deserved it. Thank you for your part in making me a reader.

    Much Love,

    Betsy (Bailey) White

    A voracious reader and bibliophile thanks to you all.

  • As seen on TikTok

    As seen on TikTok

    So…I was in a TikTok hole as is wont to happen at least to myself, and a girl popped in with something she had found on another girl’s TikTok. It looked like a book and it was called The UItimate Reading Challenge. Almost immediately I went out to find it and then because I had a gift card I ordered it from Amazon.

    I have it in my hot little hands now so…

    A book with the title The Ultimate Reading Challenge. Under this it says Complete a Goal, Open an envelope, and reveal your bookish prize.

    Inside the “book” is a series of tiny envelopes with reading challenges like:

    Read a novella (a short novel typically under 200 pages)

    Write a letter to someone who has influenced your reading life. This could be a parent, teacher, author, bookstore owner, or friend. It’s okay to make it anonymous.

    Attend an author event, in person or virtually

    Listen to a reading themed podcast

    Read a book that features an indigenous person

    And many more.

    I am excited to dive in to this. I have a couple planned out to finish soon so wish me luck.

  • And suddenly it is almost April…

    And suddenly it is almost April…

    Time is flying by with a speed that is almost shocking in its velocity. I swear it was just January and now here it is almost April. Part of it is the world coming back to semi-life after the strange half-life of covid. Part of it is the pressure of my Masters degree almost being done and wanting to ensure that I am going out on a high note. And part of it is just life being life and moving and flowing and having highs and lows as it is wont to do and I am just along for the ride.

    I am not going to try to catch up completely but in the last couple of months I saw 2 drag shows, attended a birthday party, made new friends, attended a pirate party, toured a distillery, did a whiskey tasting, did a mead tasting, attended a fancy dress party, and so much more. This is what that looked like:

    I have some weird stuff in the works, including a tiktok series of me reading the angsty and poorly written poetry of my teenage years. If you are interested find me on tiktok @betsysnowwhite.